Two Minute Movie Review: Uncertain (2017)

Uncertain (2017)

The other night, while looking at the new streaming releases on Rotten Tomatoes (a great source for something to watch), I came across a documentary called Uncertain. Here’s my one two-minute review.

Title: Uncertain
Directors: Ewan McNicol and Anna Sandilands

Genre: Documentary

Why I watched it:
It had really good reviews, and was 100% fresh.  Plus, I wanted to see how a town of 94 compares to the metropolis of Burton, TX, with a massive population of 300.

Interesting fact:
Uncertain got its name because the original surveyors were’s sure if it was in Texas or Louisiana.

Review:
I’ve watched some terrible movies lately.  I was due for a good one, and this was it.  Great character study of some interesting people living on the edge of Texas and the edge of society.  It’s sad, in a way, and hopeful in a way.  Like life.

Something I liked about it:
Mr. Ed, the hog with the horse’s head, though I support the killing of feral hogs, by any means necessary.  Wayne is an interesting dude, who seems remorseful about his past.  Henry reminds me of a number of men I knew growing up.  Zack’s theology and views on waffles are both spot-on.

Something I didn’t like about it:
That Salvinia, which is destroying Caddo Lake.  Duckweed is a pain in the ass in my ponds; I can’t imagine how hard it would be to deal with Salvinia in an entire lake.  40 square miles in 3 months!

Rating: ★★★★

Wally’s take:
He slept through it. Like a dummy.

Uncertain City Limits

More:
Rotten Tomatoes

Two Minute Movie Review: Lavender (2017)

Lavender (2016)

Last night, while stream surfing, I (unfortunately) came across a movie called Lavender. Here’s my two-minute review.

Title: Lavender
Director: Ed Gass-Donnelly
Stars: Abbie CornishDermot Mulroney

Genre: Horror (sort of)

Why I watched it:
Same as before. I like horror and science fiction, and there haven’t been many good new releases lately.  This was not one of them.

Interesting fact:
One of Cassidy’s Webkinz was named Redneval. That’s lavender backwards.

Review:
It stared out with a good, creepy vibe.  There was a farm, some nice cinematography.  Then I lost the plot and focused on trying to stay awake.  During the movie, I figured it was a The Girl on a Train thing.  I don’t even know if it was or not.  It was on my TV screen until the end, and I don’t know (or care) how it ended.  There was a flat tire and some jacks.  Somebody said something about cows.  Unless you have insomnia, you can skip this one.

Something I liked about it:
It’s set on a farm.  I love good rural literature.

Something I didn’t like about it::
It was boring.  Really boring.

Rating: ★

Wally’s take:
He slept through the whole thing.

More:
Wikipedia
Rotten Tomatoes

Two Minute Movie Review: Passengers (2016)

I watched Passengers last night. Here’s my quick review.

Title: Passengers
Director: Morten Tyldum
Genre: Sci-Fi

Why I watched it:
Slim pickings as far as new iTunes movies go lately, and I like science fiction. And Jennifer Lawrence.

Interesting fact:
There are references to The Shining throughout.  Similar vibe at the beginning.

Review:
Watchable. Not great.  Very little science.  Lots of fiction.

Something I liked about it:
Arthur, the bartender.  Loss of gravity in the swimming pool.

Something I didn’t like about it:
Lots of absurdly soft science, especially near the end.

Rating: ★★

Wally’s take:
He was unimpressed.  He’s only a dog, but even he knew some of that stuff would never, ever happen.

More:
Wikipedia
Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Review: Beasts of No Nation

Beasts_of_No_Nation_poster

I watched Beasts of No Nation yesterday and today, on the treadmill. Here’s my quick review.

Title: Beasts of No Nation
Director: Cary Fukunaga
Genre: Drama

Why I Watched It:
Netflix, which released this as its first original feature-length film, recommended it to me.

Interesting Fact:
Cary Fukunaga was the director of the first season of True Detective.

Review:
This is an excellent movie, action-packed, with great characters, and an important political message that does not get in the way of a great experience. Highly recommended.

Best Thing About It:
Abraham Attah as Agu. Oh, and Stringer Bell.

Worst Thing About It:
This is a fictional story, but this sort of thing happens for too often to far too many children.

Rating: ★★★★

More:
IMDB
Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Review: Ex_Machina

Ex-machina-uk-poster

This morning, while on the treadmill, I watched Ex_Machina. Here’s my quick review.

Title: Ex Machina
Director: Alex Garland
Genre: Sci-Fi

Why I Watched It:
It’s science fiction.  I love science fiction.

Interesting Fact:
It has similar plot elements to the (original) Star Trek Episode “Requiem for Methuselah.”

Review:
I wasn’t sure about this movie based on the reviews I read, but this is an excellent movie. I loved everything about it.  It’s great, topical science fiction, with a great story and some fine acting.

Best Thing About It:
Lots, but I’ll pick the actress that played Kyoto.

Worst Thing About It:
I can’t think of anything bad about it.

Rating: ★★★★★

More:
IMDB
Rotten Tomatos

Movie Review: Mad Max: Fury Road

madmaxfuryroad

I recently watched Mad Max: Fury Road on the treadmill.  Here’s my quick review.

Title: Mad Max: Fury Road
Director: George Miller
Genre: Sci-Fi

Why I Watched It:
I love post-apocalyptic science fiction, and the original Mad Max was pretty good.

Interesting Fact:
The filmmakers paid a lot of attention to the tools and weapons used by the actors.  With one giant exception, I thought the repurposing was nicely done.

Review:
I had really high hopes after reading some great reviews (it’s 98% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes, for crying out loud), but this is the rare movie that has over-the-top action scenes and is still sort of boring.  For much of it, I felt like I was watching someone play a video game.  The last 30 minutes are better.

Best Thing About It:
Little bits of realism (art, repurposing whatever’s at hand) mixed in with the madness.

Worst Thing About It:
The guitar and guitarist standing on front of that car.

Rating: ★★

More:
IMDB
Rotten Tomatoes

Movie Review: Insidious Chapter 3

insidious3

Delaney and I went to the movies last night, after I picked her up from Longhorns Swim Camp.

Title: Insidious Chapter 3

Director: Leigh Whannell

Genre: Horror

Interesting Fact: The power went out in the movie theater during the scary séance near the end. It was pretty creepy.

Review: Horror is my favorite genre, so I’m reasonably easy to please. This is a good and workmanlike horror film. Nothing more, but nothing less

Best Part: The window scene. I just about jumped out of my skin.

My Rating: ★★★

Delaney’s Take: “Freaky.”

More:
IMDB
Rotten Tomatoes