Category: Life

The Lamest Spam I Have Ever Received

I got an email the other day that makes those 419 scam emails seem like Pulitzer Prize material.  Let’s break it down (my comments are in italics).

From: [Sender of Lame Spam]
Sent: February **, 2010
To: [My Email Address]
Subject:

[The first hint that this was a lame spam from a clueless spammer was the fact that he (a) didn’t know that email should have or (b) forgot to add a Subject.  By itself, this could be an inadvertent oversight, but oh no, much more lameness to come.]

Dear Valued Partner:

[This is my all time favorite salutation.  From now on when you speak to me, or even think about me, I require that you address me as “Valued Partner.”  Nothing could possibly demonstrate any more clearly that this dude blasted a bunch of spam and has no idea who he’s trying to talk to.  The only thing that would have been better is if he’d addressed me as Buddy or Sport.  Or Chief.  Chief would be cool.]

image My name is [Spammer] and I am the [Cat Daddy] with [Company of Spammer], a search firm. I wanted to take a moment to
introduce myself and my firm to you, and to let you know that based upon your practice area  [You can tell he has no absolutely idea what I actually do and instead refers cleverly to my “practice area.”  He blasted this to a universe of “Valued Partners,” “Buddies,” “Sports” and “Chiefs” and it would be far too burdensome to actually research all those people.  Apply a Universal BS Translator to this and it really says “I’m too lazy to identify real leads, figure out who the heck I’m trying to communicate with and suggest possible jobs that might actually be a good fit, so I’m going to throw some terrible BS against the wall and see if anyone is desperate enough that it sticks.”], we currently have a number of very exciting opportunities which I felt you might be interested in hearing about. [Sure you do.  You don’t know my name, what I do or even who you’re writing to, but you have the perfect job picked out for me.  Wow. Thanks.]

I appreciate your time and consideration [But mostly I appreciate mine, because blasting out a ton of spam is faster than actually developing leads.], and if I can ever be of service, either now or in the future, please don’t hesitate to give me a call.

Best regards,

[Sender of Lame Spam]

3 Things I Remember About: 1975

Let’s do another installment of my 3 Things series.

Here’s the list so far.  I started with the year 1965, because that’s the first year I can remember 3 things about.

1965
1966
1967
1968
1969
1970
1971
1972
1973
1974

I started the 10th grade.  It was my only year at the old Cheraw High School.  We moved into the new Cheraw High School, across town, at the beginning of my junior year.

1) During the summer, I attended the Boy Scout World Jamboree in Lillehammer, Norway.  Here’s the newspaper article from my hometown paper.

wj

Before that, I lived with a family in Copenhagen, Denmark.  At some point during that visit, I ended up at a topless beach.  It was a great trip all around, but that was probably the highlight, for a 14 year old kid from rural South Carolina.

2) I remember seeing the Saigon airlift on TV, with the helicopter taking off from the U.S. Embassy.  Little did I know that I would one day have a close friend who left Vietnam and came to America at around that time.  She and her family were refugees from North Vietnam, having left for the south with little but the clothes on their backs.  Those of us born in America often forget just how lucky we were.

3) I also remember the Patty Hearst coverage on TV.  I didn’t really understand the point of it all (this was before the internet, etc.), but I had some vague understanding that some rich kid got kidnapped and then went all urban guerilla.  I think I had it just about right.

Assuming you were alive then, what do you remember about 1975?

5 Reasons Why I Dig the Biggest Loser

I was late to the reality show party, but at the same time I cannot stand it when a bunch of eggheads blather on about how reality shows are beneath them, and all that.  I already have a job, so what I want from TV is entertainment.  Mindless entertainment is much preferred over some high-brow nonsense that reminds me how much I hated all those books they made me read Cliff’s Notes for in English Lit classes.

image So, once I discovered Survivor and The Amazing Race a few years ago, I became a fan of both.  In fact, I bought bootleg copies of some of the old seasons that aren’t on commercial DVD.

I was even later to The Biggest Loser party.  I started watching a year or so ago.  First last season on TV (how awesome were Danny’s and Rudy’s final numbers!?), then a couple of seasons via iTunes, and finally some bootleg DVDs of other seasons.

Good stuff, and here’s why.

1. Physical Reality TV is My New Pro Sports

When I was a kid and a young adult, I loved pro sports.  Football, basketball, baseball, I watched and followed it all.  Somewhere along the way, it stopped being about the game and became about the bling and the money.  That stuff doesn’t interest me.  I still watch a lot of college sports, and a little Major League Baseball.  But, other than the occasional game I attend for business purposes, I haven’t watched 5 consecutive minutes of an NBA game in close to a decade.  After my fantasy football league folded last year, I didn’t watch one minute of an NFL game this past regular season.  And only the second half of the Super Bowl.

Over time, reality shows that emphasize physicalimage challenges have filled the void left by pro sports.  Survivor (which also has significant outdoor and camping elements, which also appeal to me), The Amazing Race and The Biggest Loser have become my new pro sports.

And let’s not overlook the actual sports embodied in many of the challenges the contestants face.  Marathons, rock-climbing, etc.  The actual sports elements of The Biggest Loser are often more interesting that what passes for pro sports.

Which I guess makes Rupert, who I happily get to watch tonight, my new Kenny Stabler.  I think that’s just fine.

2. It Generally Shows the Good Side of Human Nature

Sure, there’s a game element to it, and some people play the game full-on.  But there are many more examples of people being supportive, and doing the right thing.  Last season, among others, contestants actually asked to be voted off, because others needed more time with the trainers.  People generally support each other, both physically and emotionally, which is uplifting.  It’s nice to see people on TV making, for the most part, good decisions.  Sadly, that’s a rare thing these days.

A related element I really enjoy are the emotional transformations people often go through while on the show.  For many, weight gain is a symptom of some other problem.  For others, weight gain causes emotional issues that further complicate recovery.  I love to see someone get their head on straight while getting their body fit.  Mark in Season 5 and Courtney in Australia’s Season 2 are great examples of this.

It’s really cool when these transformations are embodied in amazing feats.  Consider Courtney, who faced- in epic fashion- a fear of heights.

 

3. It Promotes a Healthy Lifestyle

Without going into the rant that I could easily give, I think just about every single thing we see on TV these days promotes an unhealthy lifestyle in one way or another.  So a show that teaches people how and why to exercise and eat right is a fresh and much needed change of pace.

I have learned a little about training, and a lot about nutrition from watching the show.  My kids like the show for the drama and the excitement, but I have seen them, perhaps subconsciously, using things they learned from the show, in the kitchen and at snack time.

4. It is Great for Multi-tasking

One of my core approaches to life is to try to do more than one thing at a time, where reasonable to do so.  I don’t have a ton of free leisure time, so what time I have needs to be used wisely.  As a result, I watch the lion’s share of my TV in the garage, where we have set up a family gym.  I can run on the treadmill and watch TV at the same time.

Some shows (think Lost) just aren’t conducive to multi-tasking.  The Biggest Loser is perfect for it.  Plus, you can’t help but be inspired to work harder when watching others working out.

5. I Really Like the Trainers

I really like Bob Harper and Jillian Michaels (even if she does make some interesting endorsement choices).  I think they care deeply about the contestants, and I think they do a good job of being tough (in a world that needs a lot more of it) and supportive.  I loved it when Jillian refused to back down from her statements this season about Melissa’s game-playing failure to lose weight while having immunity.

When I think of people who have positively affected a lot of peoples’ lives, Bob and Jillian always end up near the top of that list.

So, yes, I’m a Biggest Loser fan.  Sure, there’s a lot of manufactured drama and a few too many tears shed, but for my money, it’s among the best entertainment out there.

And unlike most TV shows, it’s good for you.

Do Boy Scouts Matter Anymore?

Today is the 100 year anniversary of the Boy Scouts of America.  Wired has a very interesting article asking if the Boy Scouts are still relevant.

That’s a fair question.

I was a Boy Scout.  In fact I am an Eagle Scout, having obtained that rank in November of 1973, at the ripe old age of 13.  Two years later, I went to the Scout World Jamboree in Lillehammer, Norway.  When I got home, I retired from Scouting, at the top of my Scouting game.  Sandy Kofax-style.

I learned a lot from Scouts, and my love of the outdoors was certainly nurtured by the many campouts and other outdoor activities provided by Scouting.  I had some cool Scout Masters, and made some good friends via my troop (long live the Err Bear Patrol!).

image But even then, in the midst of it, I remember feeling just a little like a nerd.  I hate to admit that, given my general tendency to embrace the trappings of my simpler past.  But I’m not going to lie.  My love of the outdoors, my competitive nature that led me to work to become an Eagle and some of the contraband that we smuggled into camp, kept me involved.

But, again, under no one’s definition was I ever a gung-ho Boy Scout.

Only much later did I come to really appreciate the experience.

Me (on the left) at the 1975
Scout World Jamboree

Much like I came to appreciate some (though not all) of the at-the-time-hated so-called great literature that was forced upon me at school- because I came to realize that it was good for me.  So when I try to assess Scouting in 2010, I have to do it from both the perspective of the active Scout (is it fun?) and the adult ex-Scout (was it good for you?).

I’d have to say sort of and yes.

Let’s start with the yes.  Scouting was definitely good for me.  I don’t volunteer the fact that I was a Scout, but when people learn I am an Eagle Scout, they are generally impressed.  Many of my outdoorsman skills were learned through Scouts.

Was it fun?  Yeah, mostly.  More importantly, is it fun now?

Like many parts of life, the Scouting experience has been politicized and watered down to the point that, I suspect, the Scouting experience now is very different from the one I had.  For one thing, as I understand it, entire families now go on Scout campouts.  Sorry, but I think that’s odd.  I go camping all the time with my family.  But Boy Scouts should be a different experience.  How can you really learn to get along outdoors if dad and mom are in the tent with you?

Perhaps these rules are mainly for younger Scouts, but still.  I remember when I was initiated into the Order of the Arrow.  They made us work like dogs for 14 hours clearing trees from a future campsite.  Then they gave us a sleeping bag and an egg, and dropped us off in the woods for the night, each of us alone.  That was the high point of my Scouting experience, even if I never did get that egg cooked.

I hope I’m wrong, but I doubt it’s like that now.

I’m going to intentionally leave aside the issue of gays as Scout Masters and atheists being oppressed by the Scout Oath, and whatnot.  I see both sides of the former issue (though if pressed I will always end up on the pro-gay-rights side), and I am bored by the latter.

So is it fun?  Is it relevant?

At the end of the day, I have to say yes.  I come down on the pro-Scouting side largely because I think the Scouting experience, however diluted it may be, is better than just about any of the alternative ways for a boy to spend his weekend.

A campout, even one that everyone and his entire family attends where people tip-toe around on eggshells to avoid offending the ready-to-be-offended, has to be better than sitting in front of a computer or TV.  Learning to build a fire (assuming they still allow fires), has to be better than learning how to frag some other kid in some super-violent online, inside Xbox game.

It ain’t perfect.  Maybe it’s a little nerdy at times.  But it’s an existing framework that allows kids to get outside.  Maybe learn a skill or two.

That’s got to be OK.

Absurd, Irritating Ad from a Ford Dealership

My dad was a Ford dealer.  Until I bought my Toyota Tundra a couple of years ago, I was a loyal Ford customer.  When I bought my Toyota, I felt a little guilty.

No more.

This week, in the wake of the Toyota recalls, I received a very official looking envelope, with a large, ominous message on the front” “IMPORTANT TOYOTA RECALL INFO ENCLOSED.”

image

So I put it aside, and opened it today.

Much to my surprise and Ford-hate inducing irritation, it was not a letter explaining how to get my truck fixed.  It was an ad from a Ford dealership trying to get me to buy a Ford.  Look, there is one reason and only one reason they dressed-up the envelope like this.  To get me to open some paper-spam that I would otherwise have immediately tossed in the trash.  I don’t know if this is illegal, but it should be.

image

Candidly, I hope Freeway Ford never sells another vehicle if this is the way it tries to attract customers.

Guess what Freeway Ford?  We are shopping for a car for my wife right now.  Guess what else?  We’re not going to buy a Ford.

Letting the Lead Fly

We spent a lot of time outdoors over the Christmas holidays, including a couple of sporting clays outings with our friends the Cheneys and the Fenrichs.  Carolyn Cheney is an excellent photographer, and took some great pictures of Cassidy and me.  I combined them with a great song by my favorite band into a little video.

Photos of Cassidy and me by Carolyn Cheney
“Let the Lead Fly” by The Wrinkle Neck Mules (buy the excellent record at Amazon)

Weekend Woods and Water Update

Lots to report this weekend.

On Saturday morning, I shot my first sporting clays competition.  There were a few things I didn’t realize before hand.  Like that all stations would be at the much harder North Course.  And that all shots are doubles.  I probably should have done my homework and been aware of these nerves-inducing subtleties in advance, but where’s the fun in that.  The bad news is that I shot horribly.  The better news is that I still got third in my division.  The facts are that I need to practice more and differently.  I think I’m going to shoot the tournament at Rio Brazos next weekend.  I’d never heard of Rio Brazos before, and I’m not too keen on hunting preserves, but it’s close to Houston, and there aren’t all that many local sporting clays tournaments to choose from.

This afternoon, Cassidy and I went shooting together.  She did really well, knocking a bunch of clays down- with her .410.  I’m not sure how many I could hit with that small pattern.  The only camera I had with me was my iPhone.  She hit a bunch of clays, but this is the only shot I got on film.


(Backstroke heat (win), freestyle heat (win), 4×4 relay (backstroke)
and butterfly heat (blue Rice swimcap)).

Raina and Delaney had to leave before 7:00 for the swim meet and Cassidy spent the night at a friend’s house, so Luke and I got up this morning and went for a dude’s breakfast of bacon, eggs and grits.  Then we watched some Little Bear and chilled out on the couch.

My kids rock.

Thanksgiving Eating & Shooting Report

Here’s the rundown from a fun weekend.

We spent most of the weekend in Austin with our friends the Fenrichs and the Donovans.  We all had a grand time, and the food was excellent.

image 
The big kids got to eat their Thanksgiving meal outside.

We had a huge meal on Thursday, followed by lots of napping on the couch and football on the TV.

image
Cassidy and Remy spent much of their time in trees.

On Friday, Arnie and I shot sporting clays at the Capital City Trap & Skeet Club.  It’s a nice facility with a good mix of stations, and very nice and helpful staff.  They reciprocate with the Greater Houston Gun Club, so GHCC members get member rates there.  I didn’t shoot all that well, but the weather was perfect and we had a good time.  Afterwards, we met the rest of our families and the Donovans for dinner at El Arroyo, Raina’s favorite Austin restaurant.

I had to run a half marathon worth of miles last night, just to begin the process of recovering from all the good food I ate over the weekend.

This morning I was back out at GHGC, taking a shooting lesson from Bobby Fowler, Jr.  I like the heck out of Bobby, and he is a fantastic instructor.  He even had me hitting the rabbit shots, which have long been my Achilles’ heel (it turns out I was shooting over them, and needed to lower my barrel).  My plan is to take a lesson or so each month from Bobby and see if I can raise my game a level.  He wants me to enter some competitions, and I probably will.  In preparation for that, I joined the National Sporting Clays Association.

Raina and the kids went to Galveston this morning with her parents.  After shooting, I had a sushi lunch at Osaka.  Now its off to do some chores.