Kreskin & Me: My Hypnosis Story

Scott Adams, who is a hypnotist in addition to being the creator of Dilbert and an all-around interesting dude, has a very interesting and informative post about hypnosis.  I learned more about hypnosis in the few minutes it took to read Scott’s post than I had learned from all the other information I’ve come across in my prior 46 years.  Including the time I was hypnotized by the Amazing Kreskin.

It was around 1979-80, while I was in college.  Kreskin came to Wake Forest and did a show in Wait Chapel, where large assemblies and concerts were held at the time.

kreskin Some buddies and I went to the show and, at some point, Kreskin asked for volunteers from the audience who would agree to be hypnotized.  After reading Scott’s post, I suspect that taking volunteers is a way to increase the likelihood of success by obtaining a group of ready and willing subjects.  All I know is that I raised my hand and was picked, along with a few other people.  We went on stage and sat in some chairs that were placed in a semi-circle.

After giving us the pre-talk Scott writes about, he did a few inductions (I now know the proper lingo), and made us imagine that we were either really hot or really cold.  I don’t remember too much about this part, but I must have responded, because he picked me to do a further, more detailed hypnosis.

First, he had me sit and talked me though the relaxation process, very much the way Scott describes.  I remember everything that happened.  I remember feeling very relaxed, but I also remember wondering during the early stages if it was “working.”  As I soon found out, it was.

This was during the “who shot J.R.” period of the then very popular Dallas TV series.  It was after J.R. was shot, but before we knew who did it.  I didn’t watch the show, but like everyone else in America I knew who J.R. was and I knew the general story line.

At some point during the process Kreskin told me that when he brought me out of the trance (to borrow that misleading word), I would know who shot J.R.  I have some vague recollection of him telling me that, but I don’t recall making any conclusions about who did it at that moment.

He then brought me back to normal consciousness and told me he had a question for me.  I said OK, and he said “do you know who shot J.R.?”  “Yes,” I replied.  “Can you tell us?” he asked.  I immediately pointed at some lady I did not know in the audience and said “that lady right there did.”  Everyone howled with laughter.  I remember thinking how weird it was to say that, but I don’t remember anything about the decision process that led to me picking that particular lady.  I just somehow decided that she was the one, and for a moment or two it all made sense to me.

At no point was I unconscious or unaware of what was going on around me.  I just felt a little out of it, like I was sleepy or maybe in that state between reality and a dream- but closer to a sleepy reality.  It was weird.

But really fun.

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8 Things Meme

Steve Spalding tagged me in the 8 Things meme.  So I need to come up with 8 random things about me…

1) I am left handed, but I write with my right hand because when I was in kindergarten, the teachers made me.  They thought that writing with your left hand was abnormal.

2) I am very impatient in most situations, except fishing.  I am a very patient fisherman, which I why I catch more fish than most people.

3) My first job was as a bag boy at IGA.

4) I love card and board games.  We played Euchre with our friends the Clarks last night.

5) I am profoundly apolitical.  Almost everything about politics and politicians bores me.

6) I was once on the cover of Money Magazine.

7) I think Spaceballs is one of the funniest movies ever made.

8) My cars in order are: 1972 Chevelle Malibu; 1978 Camaro; 1986 Saab 900; 1989 Jeep Cherokee; 1992 Ford Explorer; and 2001 Ford Expedition.

I’m going to follow Steve’s lead and tag only 4 people (instead of the statutory 8):

Be a Good Mom: Because Mike already had his turn and I’m all about girl power.

Warner Crocker: Because, like me, he lives in the overlap of tech and the arts.

Dennis the Peasant: Because I can’t imagine how funny 8 random things about him will be.

Bill Liversidge:  Because I enjoy his writing, and now here’s something he’ll have to write.

If you have already answered this meme, feel (somewhat) free to ignore this tag.

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Cheraw High School, Class of 1978 Social Network

cherawhigh

In light of the recent discussion about social networking, I have been thinking about a platform to allow the class of Cheraw (SC) High School class of 1978 to reconnect a little.  I was inspired by Ethan Johnson’s blog based attempt to avoid the entrapment of Classmates.com and other walled-in social networks.

I want the platform to be community-based, where everyone feels ownership.  For that reason, I decided to create something outside of Newsome.Org.  After looking around a bit, I concluded that Ning was the best beginning point.  Using Ning, I have created the Cheraw High ’78 social network.

Now comes the problem.  Because I am a poor correspondent, I don’t know how to get the word out to my classmates.  So I am going to start by listing a few names and hoping that Google searches will lead a few people to this post, and in turn to the Cheraw High ’78 site.  If that happens, and people spread the word, it might achieve escape velocity and take off.

Or it might not.  But this is all I can do.

The rest is up to Google, and you (I don’t know any married names, so I’m going to go with what I know for the women).

Michael Graham
Kevin Morris
Thomas Burr
Tommy Rollings
Ande Rogers
Jay Leach
Theo Burns
Joe Middleton
Alan Smith
Pam Lovelace
Angie Lovelace
Pam Deprete
Julia Taylor
DeeDee Marsh
Chris Porter
Diane Swain
Sarah Young
Thomas Meyers
Gus Anderson
Ernest Ash
Eleanor Baker
Judy Cranford
Kim Dickens
Whit Fowler
Jim Graham
Bonnie Graham
Ron Korfmacher
Meg Harris

These are just a few names.  If there is any traction, I’ll add more via another post.

Let me add that I know very little about using social networks, including many of the features Ning offers.  We’ll have to figure it out together.

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A Glimmer of Hope for Jericho?

jericho

The Associated Press is reporting that CBS is considering bending to popular demand and bringing back Jericho for a mid-season run.

According to the story, a source close to the Jericho production team says that CBS is reconsidering its decision to cancel Jericho, based largely on viewer calls and emails.  Apparently the fact the Jericho is popular with young adult viewers, a demographic coveted by networks and their advertisers, is a factor working in the show’s favor.

Disgruntled viewers also delivered 50,000 pounds of peanuts to CBS’s New York office, a reference to the word “nuts,” which was used prominently in the season finale.

Jericho was/is a great show, and I hope CBS does the cool thing and brings it back.  This time without the ratings killing hiatus.

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Poolside

I’m going to try a John Watson, based on something funny I just heard.

Raina: Get of of the pool, it’s time to go eat lunch.
Raina: [30 seconds later]  Get out now.  We need to go eat lunch.
Raina: [20 seconds later] Get out!  It’s time to go eat!  Get out now!
Raina: [15 seconds later] GET OUT OF THE POOL NOW!  IT’S TIME TO GO EAT!  GET OUT NOWWWWW!!!
Delaney: What?

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Sticks and Stones: The Bullying Meme

I enjoy memes, because they are a way to find out about others – and sometimes yourself – in an interesting way, without having to write or read a boring autobiography.  I also think answers to questions are more revealing than prose, because they elicit specific information rather than whatever the writer consciously or subconsciously wants to present.  Having now mounted my defense of memes, let’s get to the business at hand.

Chip Camden tagged me in Randy Morin’s bullying meme.  So here we go.

Am I a bad person, if I’m happy to know that the bully did not live a full life?

I believe people are generally good or bad based on what they do, not what they think.  Having said that, it depends on the level of bullying and what is meant by “live a full life.”  There are certainly some things that a bully could do that would lead me to be happy if he shuffled off this mortal coil, but outside of murder, rape, etc., I would not wish death on someone.  I would, however, be happy to learn that karma or the law acted to cause a serious bully to have a bad job, go to jail, become homeless, etc.  I might want to forgive and forget, but I am an imperfect person and would be perfectly happy to hear of a little cosmic payback.

Were you bullied as a kid?

Not generally.  There were a few times I was treated badly by some older kids, but it was more of a stop following us around thing than a bullying thing.  My dad told me to avoid a fight when possible, but that there are times when there is no other way to resolve something.  I tell my kids, in cases of physical aggression only, to ask the person (be that a sibling or third party) to stop twice, and only if that doesn’t work to respond in kind (or “do what you gotta do”).  It is a hard line to draw and to walk, but I simply do not believe anyone has to accept physical abuse without defending themselves.  Of course most of my wife’s friends think I am a caveman (and not the Geico kind) in this regard.

Was bullying as rampant in your schools, as they were in mine?

Probably, although I was largely oblivious to it at the time.  If I bullied people in any way, it was by being unaware of their suffering at the hands of bullies that I may have been hanging out with.

What happened to the bullies in your school?

A couple of them are in jail, actually.  None of my close friends were bullies, so I don’t know about the rest of them.

Was it just the boys, or did the girls bully too?

I don’t know about at my school, but as a parent of girls, I am convinced that bullying by girls against other girls is much, much worse than between boys.  It’s verbal, as opposed to physical, and much harder to detect.  If two little boys are fighting on the playground, it’s obvious, and they generally forget about it by the time school’s out.  If you see one little girl whisper something to another, you have no idea what she said.  And the adverse effects seem to linger longer.  I think schools need to be much more proactive where girl to girl bullying is concerned.

Were you the bully?

Not to my knowledge.  I have generally taken up for people when I feel they are being taken advantage of.  When I was younger, I was less aware of that sort of thing, but the older I get the better my bully radar seems to be.

Bonus:  Great country song.

Now to tag some bloggers.  I’m going to dive into my new reading list, along with a few long time pals.  Bob Meets World, Nick O’Neill,  D’Arcy Norman, Nancy White, Blonde 2.0, Dave Wallace, Steven Streight and Thomas Hawk (who I think got beat up unfairly in the comments to a recent Scoble post).

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The Politics of Working

workplace myths

Guy Kawasaki asked Penelope Trunk, the author of a book on career advancement, for her 9 biggest myths of the workplace.  I’ve spent a lot of time in the workplace, a lot of it hiring and managing people.  Here’s the list, with my thoughts (and these are only my personal thoughts).

1. You’ll be happier if you have a job you like.

There’s logic (and condescension) to the garbage man in love story, but this is not a myth.  Being a pessimist can ruin any job, but the fact is that those who do what they do only for the paycheck are generally going to be less effective and less happy.  I’m not saying you have to love it so much, you’d do it for free.  But, within the context of a job, it really helps to like what you do.

2. Job-hopping will hurt you.

I think most folks have 2 maybe 3 hops.  After that, it becomes a red flag on a resume- as does missing years in the timeline (which often hide more jumping).  So it’s a matter of degree.

3. The glass ceiling still exists.

I don’t know if the glass ceiling in the traditional sense still exists or not.  But I completely agree that lots of people are stepping off the ladder and looking for life balance.  But there will always be a segment of the population who is scrambling up as fast as they can.  The important thing is to figure out where your personal sweet spot is and work towards that.  It may be to make the most money possible, or it may not.  I hope it’s not.

4. Office politics is about backstabbing.

Interestingly (at least to me), I agree that this is largely a myth.  What backstabbing remains is much more subtle, but the ones who do it are generally found out and controlled.  If you have good and attentive managers, it’s not much of a problem.

5. Do good work, and you’ll do fine.

I agree with this, but not the toot your own horn every chance you get part.  You have to do good work, period.  Then, you have to try to get others to toot your horn for you.  If I tell you I’m good, it means nothing.  If others tell you that, it means a lot.  People don’t like self promoters because people don’t like to be sold.  They like to make their own decisions.

6. You need a good resume.

This is not a myth- at least as far as content goes.  Sure, blind resumes don’t get you the job.  But once you’ve left the interview, a good resume helps you beat out the competition.  By good, I mean content.  I agree that the form and font and whatnot don’t matter.  I wouldn’t pay some so-called expert a quarter to write my resume.

7 People with good networks are good at networking.

I totally agree that this is a myth.  People who are sincere and likeable are the best at networking.  Because to them, it’s not networking- it’s living.  Nothing turns me off faster than someone who wants to get to know me mostly to leverage off that relationship for personal gain.

8. Work hard and good things will come.

I agree that this is a myth.  Hard work is a requirement, but there’s a lot more to it.  Having said that, it’s not this: “Make sure you’re not the hardest worker. Take a long lunch. Get all your work done early. Grand thinking requires space, flexibility and time. So let people see you staring at the wall. They’ll know you’re a person with big ideas and taking time to think makes you more valuable.”  Because if you do that, people won’t think you’re a person with big ideas, they’ll think you’re a slacker.  Period.

9 Create the shiny brand of you!

This sounds like a clip from some Powerpoint presentation, but I agree with this passage: “Offer your true, good-natured self to other people and you’ll have a great network. Those who stand out as leaders have a notable authenticity that enables them to make genuinely meaningful connections with a wide range of people.”

I think people tend to over analyze job advancement.  It’s really simple.  Be smart.  Be honest.  Be kind.  Work hard.  Live good.  Manage priorities.  Find your balance.

And as Webb Wilder says, wear glasses if you need ’em.

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