Siri? Really. I mean, I’m pretty invested in most things Apple, and I generally watch their announcements with a sense of reverent excitement. But even as an admitted Apple devotee, I know- and you know- that Siri is, well, awful. I have to assume Apple knows this too, at least to some extent.

From Ars Technica:

Under Apple Intelligence, Siri gets a big boost with a new logo and on-screen design, a new ability to understand more nuanced requests, and the ability to answer questions about the system state or take actions on the user’s behalf.

That’s really neat, except, in its current form, Siri cannot do anything well. 75% of my interactions with Siri involve either (a) me yelling at her to please shut the f*#k up when she randomly starts talking or (b) screaming at her to never, ever just randomly start playing music (this happens at least 3 times a week and really drives me nuts). Alexa is bad, but sort of functional (though the inability to control what shows on your Alexa device is close to a deal-stopper); Siri is just one hot mess. The fact that, by design, it often interacts- usually unsuccessfully- with its equally dysfunctional mate, Apple Home, ensures that the Siri experience…does not “just work.” Or work period.

Siri is the most un-Apple thing in the world. So I’m pretty skeptical of expanding it into more of a go-to feature across my devices. Here’s hoping ChatGPT can save the day.

I’ll believe it when I don’t hear it.